[dong]

The hostility some people put out isn't needed in any scenario. Only thing I can really say about that is the classic, "this is the internet and there are a lot of asshats out there." As for your mental state, I would definitely take a real break from here. I've stressed that to you many times. You care a lot which is good, but I can tell that it is eating you alive. You put out this effort to make this place better and in return people attack you in-game or whatever. That's so draining.

So let me ask you this question. It will have parallels, but this is a completely different scenario.

Let's say you're in a relationship where you're giving someone your all and they aren't reciprocating you or are being a total ass the entire time. What would you do? Probably about a 50-50 response here, but half would take a break from said individual due to them being absolutely drained and getting nothing back and come back later, or they would stick it and fight. Whether or not that last one is worth it will be based on the other side, not YOU.

I talk to you on almost a daily basis and I can tell that while you have fun playing here it still seems like most of the time you are drained and sad. Take a REAL break from here Jesse. Don't play for however long you need. The server will be fine I can promise you that. Download some free games on Steam or pick up a game like League, very time consuming and can be fun with certain people.