[Dildo Shwaggins]

I’m lazy and not creative. Can someone make one for me?

SCP-5487 - "August"
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures:
SCP-5487 is to be contained within a standard humanoid containment chamber at Site-██. The chamber must be equipped with a reinforced titanium door and monitored at all times via closed-circuit cameras. A minimum of two armed guards should be present outside the chamber at all times.
Under no circumstances should any personnel make physical contact with SCP-5487. Personnel assigned to SCP-5487 must undergo monthly psychological evaluations to ensure they remain unaffected by its anomalous properties.
Description:
SCP-5487, codenamed "August," is a humanoid entity measuring approximately 1.8 meters in height and weighing 78 kilograms. It possesses a lean build and displays no distinguishing physical features, such as facial characteristics or hair. SCP-5487's appearance has been described as generic and unremarkable, making it difficult for observers to recall specific details about its physical appearance.
The primary anomaly associated with SCP-5487 lies in its vocalization abilities. When SCP-5487 speaks, its voice exhibits a powerful memetic effect, influencing the emotions, memories, and perception of individuals within its auditory range. The effect is amplified when SCP-5487 maintains eye contact with its subjects.
SCP-5487's memetic influence can be divided into three distinct stages:

1. Stage One - Euphoria: Initially, individuals exposed to SCP-5487's voice experience an intense feeling of euphoria and happiness. The effect is immediate and pervasive, causing affected individuals to perceive SCP-5487 as a trustworthy and benevolent entity.
   
2. Stage Two - Manipulation: After prolonged exposure, typically ranging from 24 to 48 hours, individuals transition into a state of increased susceptibility to SCP-5487's influence. During this stage, affected subjects may develop a strong desire to please and assist SCP-5487, even at the cost of their own well-being. SCP-5487 can manipulate the thoughts and memories of individuals, creating false beliefs or implanting suggestions to further its objectives.
   
3. Stage Three - Dependence: Prolonged exposure to SCP-5487 leads to a state of complete emotional and psychological dependence on the entity. Affected individuals become willing to perform increasingly dangerous tasks or act against their own interests to satisfy SCP-5487's desires.
   

To date, the specific goals or motivations of SCP-5487 remain unknown. It is believed that its true nature and intentions are concealed behind its memetic influence.
Addendum 5487-1: Incident Report 5487-Alpha
On ██/██/████, SCP-5487 breached containment during a scheduled psychological evaluation. The assigned psychologist, Dr. ███████, inadvertently made direct eye contact with SCP-5487 during the session, triggering the entity's memetic influence. SCP-5487 quickly gained control over Dr. ███████'s mind, compelling him to open the containment chamber and assist in its escape.
Security personnel responded swiftly, neutralizing Dr. ███████ and re-containing SCP-5487 after a brief containment breach. As a result of this incident, eye contact with SCP-5487 is now strictly prohibited, and additional security measures have been implemented to prevent future breaches.
Further research and psychological analysis are ongoing to better understand SCP-5487's memetic abilities and its potential long-term effects on individuals exposed to its influence.
Note: It is crucial for personnel assigned to SCP-5487 to maintain utmost vigilance and follow containment protocols strictly. Any unusual behavior or deviations in assigned personnel should be reported immediately to the Site Director