[murl]

in high school, I knew a dude named Gabe who always argued with the lunch ladies that they were intentionally serving him smaller portions than everyone else

in college, I knew a dude named Gabe who camped out in the student lounge area and would accept food to fix people's computer problems

in my past place of employment, I knew a dude named Gabe who would make an effort to track down every meeting with catered food and would shove as much as he could into his crusty laptop bag. our boss brought us donuts for a team meeting 3 floors away and Gabe managed to track it down via the open company meeting calendar. "ooo don't mind if I do" were the only words this guy ever spoke to me.

now, I'm not saying all Gabes are like this, but at this point I am conditioned to believe every single Gabe I meet has some sort of unending hunger